How to Heal Your Relationship with Money


Money is one of those topics most of us save for those “have to” moments. If there’s no urgent need to focus on money, we’d much rather think about something else. Like dinner, laundry, or scrubbing a toilet. But when your goal is to increase your wellness holistically, it’s time to face your relationship with money.

Our relationship with money is formed early in life through a mix of experiences with other people and the world around us. Perhaps you grew up in a religious household where you often heard “money is the root of all evil” and other negative sentiments toward money. Or maybe you grew up hearing “we can’t afford that” over and over and over again.

Some of us grew up with plenty of money around, but we were taught poor management skills and never learned to save or spend cautiously. Whichever situation strikes a chord with you, the majority of us have had to wrestle with poor attitudes toward money throughout our lives.

Often, this has led us to fear, anger, frustration, and sadness around money. We hear the words “money” and “finances” and our heartbeat picks up a few paces. But if you truly want to break free of unhealthy behaviors and step into the holistic wellness space, you’ll need to focus on your relationship with money along the way.
How to Heal Your Relationship with Money

What a Healthy Relationship with Money Looks Like

Most of us have seen what a poor relationship with money looks like, but we don’t even really know what a healthy relationship looks like. Imagine knowing exactly where all your money is going, when, and how much. Opening up your bank account information with neutrality or positivity, instead of worry and fear of what you’ll find.

In your work, you’re not afraid to tell clients your fees and then confidently stand by those fees. If you have an employer, you happily ask for raises and feel confident when doing so because you know how to communicate your value. Asking for money, in general, feels easy because you know you’re worth it.

At home, you only pay for things you love, that you need, and that you believe in. Frugality plays into your life, but you look at it as a mindfulness activity. The goal is to spend your money in ways that feel positive and that you believe in. When you need to buy something, you feel empowered to buy the best quality you can afford and that matches your values about sustainability and human rights.

With your family, you work to create memories and to teach your kids or the children in your care about healthy money attitudes. You live as though money flows your way easily, comes abundantly, and is meant for you. You have replaced negative comments like “we can’t afford that” with positive statements like “that sounds fun – let’s find a way to make it happen.”
Overall, you feel positively toward your relationship with money instead of fear and depression. You’ve healed your relationship with money and finances. So how do you get there?

How to Heal Your Relationship with Money

Here are a few exercises to help you get started toward a more abundant money mindset.

1. Realize that money itself is neutral.

We tend to direct our negative attitudes toward money itself. In reality, money is just a tool like your car, your computer, or your clothes. Any emotion we associate with it comes from inside us instead of from the money itself. Once you pull away all the cultural attitudes, you can start seeing it for what it is. Then you can start healing your feelings toward it and move toward abundance.

2. Weave self-value into your mindfulness practice.

We often attach our feelings of worthiness to money and get confused about where our feelings end and the money begins. Learn to pull these ideas apart and begin to think about your perception of value. The more that you feel valuable, the more confident you will feel about being worthy of receiving money. Use your mindfulness practice to work on your sense of self-value.

3. Get therapy for deep trauma that might be causing money blocks.

We tend to think of money as surface-level fluff. But really, sometimes our money blocks come from deep, deep issues that need to be resolved. Don’t be afraid to take your money issues to a good therapist who can help you heal. By healing your trauma, you might find your money attitude transform into something more positive.

4. Start a gratitude journal.

Most of us who worry about money tend to hyperfocus on lack. We might fixate on all the things in our lives that are going wrong, aren’t enough, or just aren’t right. By starting a gratitude journal, you can help shift your mindset from one of lack to one of abundance. The more abundantly you think, the more you’ll approach things from this perspective. Practicing gratitude will also help you focus on how things are going right in your life, which will encourage you to create more goodness.

5. Take time to be with your money mindset.

Having a relationship with money takes effort, just like having a relationship with a person does. Try to set yours up from a positive, trusting perspective so your relationship can flourish and grow. Remember that money itself is neutral and it’s your job to give it the beautifully positive vibes you’ll need to heal. Set up regular “dates” with your money so you can give it focus, infuse your intentions into it, and help it feel your abundant energy.

6. Be willing to learn and get professional help.

The healthiest attitude to have about money is to get curious about it. Read books that help you shift your mindset and grow your relationship with money. Attend workshops and classes in person and online. Invest in software and apps that help you grow abundant thinking and track your money in positive ways. Hire professionals who can help you get on track, invest wisely and sustainably, teach you new ways, and help you stay accountable. Don’t be afraid to stretch your abundance muscle and grow so you can invite more money into your life.

Lean Into Your Relationship With Money

Our society loves to shame those who are financially successful. If you’ve worked hard to develop a positive money mindset, healed your relationship, and invested in your self-worth, know that you’re building a healthy money mindset for life. Keep showing up for yourself and your growth and it will pay off. Over time, you’ll notice things changing in your world in big, abundant ways.

Always remember that a crucial part of wellness is financial wellness, and you’re worth investing in.

If you’re feeling the call to help others rebalance out their relationships with money, you might enjoy becoming a Wellness Coach. Our unparalleled accredited Holistic Health and Wellness Coach certification offers unique support and systems to ensure you start your career off right. Reach out to an admissions advisor today to discover how our program can help you achieve your goals! 
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About the Author

Suzanne Monroe

Suzanne Monroe is the author of Live Well Dream Big: The Ultimate Guide to Becoming Your Best Self and Living Life on Your Own Terms. She has also written and published The Holistic Cookbook & Lifestyle Guide: 12 Weeks to a Healthier, Happier You, the co-author of 101 Ways to Improve Your Health and the host of the Live Well Dream Big Podcast. Suzanne was inspired to create the IAWP Wellness Coach Training & Certification Program in collaboration with other leading health experts in order to inspire people to create meaningful careers and spread the message of wellness.

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